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| 05:38am 18/12/2006 |
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mood:  tired music: Revolution Deathsquad-Dragonforce
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So it has been a good long time since I have been on here or aim. Im sure all of you weren't that concerned where I was, but here I am. Back once again to wreak havoc upon live journal.
A lot has changed in the last few months. So much that I dont even want to write about it right now. I just got off of work so im pretty worn out.
In a shorty summary of the past couple of months I will say this much, im a bartender now, I broke up with my bitch of an ex-girlfriend, I overcame a nasty stomach problem, my life is great now and I am having so much fun with everything. Thats the past couple of months in a nutshell.
I'll write the whole story later.
Untill then have fun and take it easy.
Later |
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(1 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 04:08am 22/07/2006 |
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mood: sleepy
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So just to let you all know, i have now been getting on aim every so often. If you havnt seen me on then sorry, i dont stay online for long periods of time like i used to. If you do see me on aim then drop me a line.
Thats all for now...
And now lets check on the weather. |
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(2 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 05:09am 06/07/2006 |
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mood:  awake music: Fox 26 News
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So are you suprised im still alive?
I havn't written in this thing in a long long time.
Shits goods.
I have a wonderful loving girlfriend whom i love very much.
I hope this rain keeps up, its nice sleeping weather.
Works good. Once Luke gets back im gonna look for a second barbacking job. Hopefully ill get a bartending job sometime soon.
Well im gonna finish my budlight and hit the hay. I need sleep.
Later |
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(10 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 04:29am 03/06/2006 |
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mood:  high music: some new afi song
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I havnt updated in a long time as we can see.
Lifes going good/weird. I hope it all goes good in the end.
I got the new AFI cd today from a friend. Not bad.
Still at the bar.
Still love the same woman.
lifes been pretty much the same. Guess thats why I havnt updated in ages.
Later. |
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(5 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 04:09am 21/05/2006 |
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mood:  drunk music: rabbits are roadkill-AFI
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So life is very confusing. As off right now its good, but i have to keep an eye on it or else.
I might be going to the warped tour this year but im not 100% sure yet. Theres not too many great bands on the lineup but theres a couple of good ones i would love to see, such as....
NOFX
AFI
Anti-Flag
The Casualties
Rise Against
Less Than Jake
Aiden(only 3 of there songs are actually good to me)
and The Bouncing Souls
Other than those bands, there doesnt seem to be a good reason to go. I wish Avenged Sevenfold was going to be on it, but there going to be on the ozzfest tour this year. The closest they are coming to houston is going to be San Antonio so im thinking maybe a road trip to go see those guys. I got some friends in san antonio anyway so that would be cool. Even if there not in town at that point ill sleep in my fuckin car just to go see those guys.
Well im drunk so im gonna go sleep. Think i might do somthing extra to get to bed.
Later |
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(Our voices sing in union.) |
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| 05:46pm 14/05/2006 |
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mood:  depressed music: the theft-Atreyu
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So im still in that hole i was in.
Why is it you can love someone so much and know your going to get hurt, yet still go through with it. I dont undertstand.
I took a chance and have seen how far it has taken me. I hope I can make it still go further.
Ill see her monday I think. I would have seen her today but shes still out of houston. I hope everything can go back to how it was between us.
Wish me luck :( |
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(3 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 01:41pm 12/05/2006 |
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mood: depressed
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yeah depression sucks. I hate these depression holes.
Life was going good but it just turned around on my ass.
I dont care about really anything anymore.
Remember on my old entries where I had a little "conversation with life", well life just finished the conversation and it said "haha i got you good, fucked with your heart,head and life so much."
Yeah, I hate life. |
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(4 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 12:31pm 09/05/2006 |
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mood: tired music: the last sunrise-Aiden
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So you wont be hearing much from me for a little while. I just recently moved into my apartment and i dont have internet or anything yet. I have my computer but i dont have internet yet. I want to make sure ill be able to make my rent and my electricity bill before i try and purchase something else. If i cant afford it i dont want it to fuck my credit over or anything like that.
So i just wanted to pretty much let people know thats why i havnt been online lately or really put up a new journal entry.
Later |
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(2 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 05:55am 03/05/2006 |
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mood: tired music: birds chirping outside
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Just to let everyone know if they havn't heard already,
Amirah Ramsey passed away monday night. I just found out on the channel 12's news. They said she lost her fight to brain cancer.
R.I.P. Amirah, you were one amazing person. |
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(Our voices sing in union.) |
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| 10:53am 19/04/2006 |
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mood: hung over music: on wings of lead-Bleeding Through
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Oh the after effects of drinking.
Too much beer pong and Lone Star.
Ow, my head. |
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(Our voices sing in union.) |
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| 02:18am 11/04/2006 |
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mood: depressed music: the theft-Atreyu
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"He bends and he breaks
If he gives they will take away
His passion, his pain, his grace
He exhales,
A thousand black flowers explode
into butterflies as they're away
Rip them out, take them,
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
See him numb, see him crushed
Rip them out, take them
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
Leave him numb, leave him crushed
Took the fire inside
One too many times
He's burning over and out now,
He flails
Up against the raging tides,
No more sides
Everything you ever wanted to see,
See it in his eyes
One more time, one more time
Climb down to test the waters,
My hands feel like they're rusting away,
So I'll pace around like a lamb before the slaughter
I'll stay here as long as you let me,
Decisions been made obvious so I will return
Where I started I'll stay here
Unfinished
I'll wither away
Rip them out, take them,
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
See him numb, see him crushed
Rip them out, take them
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
Leave him numb, leave him crushed"-Atreyu
I dont want comments,e-mails,calls,or instant messages about how you will be there for me if i need you. Just stop, stop caring. I dont know people anymore. I wish I could just start over fresh not knowing anybody. I dont want to know anybody anymore. I want to seperate myself from everyone. Nobody can help me, nor do i want anybodys help. Frankly i dont care what anybody thinks, of me or of what i say. Call me an asshole, someone whos emo, call me whatever the fuck you want. Frankly I dont give a damn anymore. I have been fucked over too many times by people and frankly im sick of it. Everybody can just kiss my ass.
Fuck off, everyone.
"Maybe I'll do better on my own"-Bleeding Through
-edit-
Just so you know from now on also. There are only 4 people i will ever fucking trust. And just so you dont start acting like children getting your little fucking hopes up, the only people i trust are Brandon,Courtney,Paige, and Jared. |
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| 02:02am 30/03/2006 |
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mood: depressed
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So life sucks as always.
Just thought i would put that out there.
Just when i think shits getting better, it goes back to being bad.
"aren't you tired cause I will carry you, on a broken back
And blown out knees, I have been where you are for a while.."
"After all these images of pain, have cut right thru you,
I will kiss every scar, and weep you are not alone..." |
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(Our voices sing in union.) |
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| 05:16pm 07/03/2006 |
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mood: depressed
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I'm sorry, I don't think it's going to be okay this time
My heart has skipped its final beat
It's beating me down onto the floor
That must mean that the pills are working
The glass isn't half empty this time
I smashed it to the ground a long long time ago
It shattered when it fell and I broke to pieces
Each shard's another reason, another way to give up |
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(4 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 04:47am 04/03/2006 |
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mood: drunk
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So another year down the tube as always.
I honestly dont know how I survived. Whatever.
Lets see if I can survive another year of heartache and problems. |
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(Our voices sing in union.) |
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| 02:52am 27/02/2006 |
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mood: sad music: santeria-Sublime
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So life threw me a curve ball.
Just when i think shits going to possibly go good for me at one point, it goes back to saying no.
So it happend like this.
Life:"oh you think you know whats going to happen huh?"
Me:"yep"
Life:"Naw, this is whats going to happen"
Me:"Fucking Awesome!"
Life:"actually i was just kidding, you were right"
Me:"Dick bag"
So yeah thats pretty much how life kidna fucked with my head at this point in my life. I did come out wiser though.
To tell you the truth i dont even know if thats the end of it. Something tells me it isnt, i dont know if it will go good or bad but what i have decided to do is just keep doing what i have been doing and i actually have a good feeling about that. Something tells me something good will come out of this. Im just going to take it day by day and see what happens.
So yeah wish me luck. Just I-M me and tell me though, i dont want comments flooding this entry because i dont want people putting shit that might actually explain what im talking about. I wrote this entry the way i did for a reason. So yeah, just do that if you want to wish me luck.
Oh and one more thing, the conversation between life and me is figurative. Life does not represent an actual person. If you thought it did then someone should probably smack you.
Have a nice day. |
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| Why do I feel so alone? |
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| 11:55pm 19/02/2006 |
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mood:  confused music: the wicked end-Avenged Sevenfold
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So for some odd reason, tonight I just had this huge wave of emotion hit me. As odd as it sounds i was just sad.
I dont really know why it happend but it did. Normally I have just been kinda living my life without any cares and shit was perfect. For some odd reason though I still feel something is missing. Im not really sure what it is but somethings just not here.
In all honesty I know whats missing, but im not going to spill the beans because I dont want people bugging me about this shit.
In other news:
Schools going good. Im keeping up with my studys which im proud of. I got a math test coming up soon which shouldnt be too bad, but who knows. I gotta take the practice test to find out how its going to be. Im about to go take an algebra quiz in a minute.
Works going good as well. Im really happy with the job and how stuff is going. I got work this upcoming friday and saturday so im happy.
About 1 week and 6 days untill my birthday. This will be my last year as a teenager, im glad for the most part because that means only 2 more years untill im 21, but im slightly sad because when I look back at my life I realize that I havn't taken many chances and that im not really doing stuff I wish I could do. Oh well, lifes been good so far so I must be doing something right.
Hmmm... this turned out to be a slightly sad entry. Oh well, im human. I have the right to be sad.
"We wont be here tomarrow, hold on to me one last time"-A7X |
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(2 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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| 10:49am 14/02/2006 |
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mood: awake music: ghost of perdition-Opeth
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So i just read that Avenged Sevenfold was going to go on tour with Coheed and Cambria. Ill still go see a7x but common, coheed and cambria??
There coming back to houston on monday april 17th at the verizon wireless theatre. I dont know how much tickets are yet but im gonna go to it.
Just informing people.
Later |
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(5 The peoples voice will sing as one voiceOur voices sing in union.) |
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