When sin's deep in my blood, you'll be the one to fall.

Welcome back

Mon, 18 Dec 2006 10:38:13 GMT

So it has been a good long time since I have been on here or aim. Im sure all of you weren't that concerned where I was, but here I am. Back once again to wreak havoc upon live journal.

A lot has changed in the last few months. So much that I dont even want to write about it right now. I just got off of work so im pretty worn out.

In a shorty summary of the past couple of months I will say this much, im a bartender now, I broke up with my bitch of an ex-girlfriend, I overcame a nasty stomach problem, my life is great now and I am having so much fun with everything. Thats the past couple of months in a nutshell.

I'll write the whole story later.

Untill then have fun and take it easy.

Later

Thu, 07 Sep 2006 09:24:57 GMT

Im starting to get real annoyed with people. Pretty much the whole human race.

Why do I feel like im being used?

Sat, 22 Jul 2006 09:11:02 GMT

So just to let you all know, i have now been getting on aim every so often. If you havnt seen me on then sorry, i dont stay online for long periods of time like i used to. If you do see me on aim then drop me a line.

Thats all for now...

And now lets check on the weather.

Thu, 13 Jul 2006 09:28:13 GMT

I took this quiz that one of my friends took and I thought it was pretty funny.

Your Inner European is Irish!

Sprited and boisterous!
You drink everyone under the table.

Who's Your Inner European?

Thu, 06 Jul 2006 10:16:33 GMT

So are you suprised im still alive?

I havn't written in this thing in a long long time.

Shits goods.

I have a wonderful loving girlfriend whom i love very much.

I hope this rain keeps up, its nice sleeping weather.

Works good. Once Luke gets back im gonna look for a second barbacking job. Hopefully ill get a bartending job sometime soon.

Well im gonna finish my budlight and hit the hay. I need sleep.

Later

Tue, 06 Jun 2006 21:16:14 GMT

Even though I think its kind of dumb,

Happy 666 everyone.

I hope everyone has had a devilishly bad day.

Later

Sat, 03 Jun 2006 09:31:19 GMT

I havnt updated in a long time as we can see.

Lifes going good/weird. I hope it all goes good in the end.

I got the new AFI cd today from a friend. Not bad.

Still at the bar.

Still love the same woman.

lifes been pretty much the same. Guess thats why I havnt updated in ages.

Later.

Sun, 21 May 2006 09:15:39 GMT

So life is very confusing. As off right now its good, but i have to keep an eye on it or else.

I might be going to the warped tour this year but im not 100% sure yet. Theres not too many great bands on the lineup but theres a couple of good ones i would love to see, such as....

NOFX
AFI
Anti-Flag
The Casualties
Rise Against
Less Than Jake
Aiden(only 3 of there songs are actually good to me)
and The Bouncing Souls

Other than those bands, there doesnt seem to be a good reason to go. I wish Avenged Sevenfold was going to be on it, but there going to be on the ozzfest tour this year. The closest they are coming to houston is going to be San Antonio so im thinking maybe a road trip to go see those guys. I got some friends in san antonio anyway so that would be cool. Even if there not in town at that point ill sleep in my fuckin car just to go see those guys.

Well im drunk so im gonna go sleep. Think i might do somthing extra to get to bed.

Later

Sun, 14 May 2006 22:49:54 GMT

So im still in that hole i was in.

Why is it you can love someone so much and know your going to get hurt, yet still go through with it. I dont undertstand.

I took a chance and have seen how far it has taken me. I hope I can make it still go further.

Ill see her monday I think. I would have seen her today but shes still out of houston. I hope everything can go back to how it was between us.

Wish me luck :(

Fri, 12 May 2006 18:44:54 GMT

yeah depression sucks. I hate these depression holes.

Life was going good but it just turned around on my ass.

I dont care about really anything anymore.

Remember on my old entries where I had a little "conversation with life", well life just finished the conversation and it said "haha i got you good, fucked with your heart,head and life so much."

Yeah, I hate life.

Tue, 09 May 2006 17:40:19 GMT

So you wont be hearing much from me for a little while. I just recently moved into my apartment and i dont have internet or anything yet. I have my computer but i dont have internet yet. I want to make sure ill be able to make my rent and my electricity bill before i try and purchase something else. If i cant afford it i dont want it to fuck my credit over or anything like that.

So i just wanted to pretty much let people know thats why i havnt been online lately or really put up a new journal entry.

Later

Wed, 03 May 2006 10:58:09 GMT

Just to let everyone know if they havn't heard already,

Amirah Ramsey passed away monday night. I just found out on the channel 12's news. They said she lost her fight to brain cancer.

R.I.P. Amirah, you were one amazing person.

Sat, 29 Apr 2006 04:07:06 GMT

So this weekend and past week has been by far the happiest of my life.

I hope to God it doesnt end.

Wed, 19 Apr 2006 15:56:11 GMT

Oh the after effects of drinking.

Too much beer pong and Lone Star.

Ow, my head.

Sat, 15 Apr 2006 09:02:19 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ze2T6j5qpo&search=avenged%20sevenfold%20live

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9en-HxX0IMU&search=avenged%20sevenfold%20live

Best fucking videos ever.

Tue, 11 Apr 2006 07:36:58 GMT

"He bends and he breaks
If he gives they will take away
His passion, his pain, his grace

He exhales,
A thousand black flowers explode
into butterflies as they're away

Rip them out, take them,
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
See him numb, see him crushed
Rip them out, take them
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
Leave him numb, leave him crushed

Took the fire inside
One too many times
He's burning over and out now,
He flails
Up against the raging tides,
No more sides
Everything you ever wanted to see,
See it in his eyes
One more time, one more time

Climb down to test the waters,
My hands feel like they're rusting away,
So I'll pace around like a lamb before the slaughter
I'll stay here as long as you let me,
Decisions been made obvious so I will return
Where I started I'll stay here
Unfinished
I'll wither away

Rip them out, take them,
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
See him numb, see him crushed
Rip them out, take them
Burn to coals as they crush him
Leave nothing
that resembles a soul of a man
Leave him numb, leave him crushed"-Atreyu

I dont want comments,e-mails,calls,or instant messages about how you will be there for me if i need you. Just stop, stop caring. I dont know people anymore. I wish I could just start over fresh not knowing anybody. I dont want to know anybody anymore. I want to seperate myself from everyone. Nobody can help me, nor do i want anybodys help. Frankly i dont care what anybody thinks, of me or of what i say. Call me an asshole, someone whos emo, call me whatever the fuck you want. Frankly I dont give a damn anymore. I have been fucked over too many times by people and frankly im sick of it. Everybody can just kiss my ass.

Fuck off, everyone.

"Maybe I'll do better on my own"-Bleeding Through

-edit-
Just so you know from now on also. There are only 4 people i will ever fucking trust. And just so you dont start acting like children getting your little fucking hopes up, the only people i trust are Brandon,Courtney,Paige, and Jared.

Thu, 30 Mar 2006 08:05:57 GMT

So life sucks as always.

Just thought i would put that out there.

Just when i think shits getting better, it goes back to being bad.

"aren't you tired cause I will carry you, on a broken back
And blown out knees, I have been where you are for a while.."

"After all these images of pain, have cut right thru you,
I will kiss every scar, and weep you are not alone..."

Tue, 21 Mar 2006 05:52:22 GMT

I cant belive it has gotten to the point to where i need to drink myself to sleep.

Im gonna grow up to be an alchoholic, if i even get that far.

"How ever long I stay, I will always love you...."

"Happiness is an emotion I was born to this world without"

Sun, 19 Mar 2006 04:17:05 GMT

I can only hope and pray that the pain will all end tonight.

Im Sorry

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 20:21:19 GMT

So last night I did something that I never thought i would do again. But I did it.

This spring break sucks ass so much.

I hate life so much right now its not even funny.

Tue, 07 Mar 2006 23:18:03 GMT

I'm sorry, I don't think it's going to be okay this time
My heart has skipped its final beat
It's beating me down onto the floor
That must mean that the pills are working
The glass isn't half empty this time
I smashed it to the ground a long long time ago
It shattered when it fell and I broke to pieces
Each shard's another reason, another way to give up

Sat, 04 Mar 2006 10:48:28 GMT

So another year down the tube as always.

I honestly dont know how I survived. Whatever.

Lets see if I can survive another year of heartache and problems.

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 09:04:50 GMT

So life threw me a curve ball.

Just when i think shits going to possibly go good for me at one point, it goes back to saying no.

So it happend like this.
Life:"oh you think you know whats going to happen huh?"
Me:"yep"
Life:"Naw, this is whats going to happen"
Me:"Fucking Awesome!"
Life:"actually i was just kidding, you were right"
Me:"Dick bag"

So yeah thats pretty much how life kidna fucked with my head at this point in my life. I did come out wiser though.

To tell you the truth i dont even know if thats the end of it. Something tells me it isnt, i dont know if it will go good or bad but what i have decided to do is just keep doing what i have been doing and i actually have a good feeling about that. Something tells me something good will come out of this. Im just going to take it day by day and see what happens.

So yeah wish me luck. Just I-M me and tell me though, i dont want comments flooding this entry because i dont want people putting shit that might actually explain what im talking about. I wrote this entry the way i did for a reason. So yeah, just do that if you want to wish me luck.

Oh and one more thing, the conversation between life and me is figurative. Life does not represent an actual person. If you thought it did then someone should probably smack you.

Have a nice day.

Why do I feel so alone?

Mon, 20 Feb 2006 06:31:50 GMT

So for some odd reason, tonight I just had this huge wave of emotion hit me. As odd as it sounds i was just sad.

I dont really know why it happend but it did. Normally I have just been kinda living my life without any cares and shit was perfect. For some odd reason though I still feel something is missing. Im not really sure what it is but somethings just not here.

In all honesty I know whats missing, but im not going to spill the beans because I dont want people bugging me about this shit.

In other news:

Schools going good. Im keeping up with my studys which im proud of. I got a math test coming up soon which shouldnt be too bad, but who knows. I gotta take the practice test to find out how its going to be. Im about to go take an algebra quiz in a minute.

Works going good as well. Im really happy with the job and how stuff is going. I got work this upcoming friday and saturday so im happy.

About 1 week and 6 days untill my birthday. This will be my last year as a teenager, im glad for the most part because that means only 2 more years untill im 21, but im slightly sad because when I look back at my life I realize that I havn't taken many chances and that im not really doing stuff I wish I could do. Oh well, lifes been good so far so I must be doing something right.

Hmmm... this turned out to be a slightly sad entry. Oh well, im human. I have the right to be sad.

"We wont be here tomarrow, hold on to me one last time"-A7X

Tue, 14 Feb 2006 16:51:38 GMT

So i just read that Avenged Sevenfold was going to go on tour with Coheed and Cambria. Ill still go see a7x but common, coheed and cambria??

There coming back to houston on monday april 17th at the verizon wireless theatre. I dont know how much tickets are yet but im gonna go to it.

Just informing people.

Later